Do you remember how it felt to be in Kindergarten? Not a care in the world. Not a burden to carry. The biggest worry was that the ice cream man would drive by your house and your mom might say no. Or worse, she would say yes, but you would fear missing him while you searched for your money.
As the weather has changed to warm, Spring afternoons, my Kindergartener's favorite thing to do is run outside and play immediately after school. I don't think her backpack even makes it out of the car most days. The neighborhood kids all come out and greet one another and then conjure up some fun game to play or activity to do. Yesterday, I could hear my Kindergartener and her friend riding bikes around the cul-de-sac chatting away like two little old ladies who needed to catch up on the latest news.
I stood by the storm door watching and listening my little one's free spirit, just enjoying the crisp Spring air with her friends, and I was jealous. Jealous that I couldn't throw off the weight of the day, or leave it in the car as she had done, and just ride around the cul-de-sac chatting away and playing make believe. Instead, I was inside battling inner chatter, that self-doubt chatter that so easily creeps in and tries to be my friend. That "need to figure it all out" kind of chatter that can consume my mind. This kind of chatter thinks it is my friend, but it is not. It creeps in and steals my joy and steals my peace. It is not my friend, it is the enemy of distraction.
Isaiah 26:3 says, "You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed, on you, because he trusts in you." It is a battle to keep my mind on Him. This distracting chatter that enters my mind often deters me from keeping my mind and heart on the One who already knows everything I'm trying to figure out. So I am left with a choice. Do I stay inside the comfort of my home and listen to the chatter of my mind, or do I choose to step outside, embrace joy, and let peace envelope me like the warm, Spring air?
My desire to know, plan, and explain can so easily set my mind off of the trust I do have in Jesus. The enemy is real and he uses distractions to keep my mind occupied so I do not think on the truth that I do know of Jesus' love for me and His plans for me. So today I choose to step outside, leave my burdens in the car, play like a Kindergartener and chat away like a little old lady. Who knows, maybe the ice cream man will even come down the road, and I'll say yes.
