I don't think I ever feel weaker than when I am on the brink of the unknown. To some, starting a blog is probably no big deal. It shouldn't be to me, I wrote a family blog for years. Much to the sadness of many family members I have failed in keeping it updated and active. Life happened, and it happened so fast I forgot to write it down.
So here I sit, oh many months since my last post on my "other" blog, really not sure if I should take this leap. I'm one of those people that watches what I say, thanks to experiences where I have not and truly regretted the outcome. So, I watch what I say so closely that usually I end up saying nothing at all! Which probably makes most people happy, except I feel left with a full mind and nowhere to really let it all out. It's not like I have anything grand to add to conversations, unless of course that conversation is about infant colic! I believe I just have the mind of a writer. It seems to run in my family, so there's a good chance I do. Having the mind of a writer merely means that I was designed by God to write. Possibly not always speak with spoken word, but to speak with written word. If I make any kind of impact on any other person, hopefully positive, then I've used something the Lord gave me, for His glory. That's all I want to do, use the talents He has given me for the purpose He has planned. So whether I know you, or by some chance you stumble across this blog, I hope that in some small way you will find a morsel of encouragement.
I am so weak at this point in my life. The Lord has allowed circumstances in my life that are beyond my control to fix, adjust, mend, repair, solve....things just are the way they are. I have resolved to Him that I am too weak to carry any of it. Oh, I daily try to take back just a little of it and try to speed up the process of resolution, but His timeline seems to be much different than mine. I have to constantly remember that I am not the author here, He is.
Lately the Lord has really been laying on my heart this idea of weakness, strength and grace. How are they connected, how do they apply to my life? What evidence is there of each in my life? 2 Corinthians 12:10 says "Therefore I am well content with weakness...for Christ's sake; for when I am weak, then I am strong." Avoiding situations where I feel weak does not allow the Lord to show me His strength. He has brought me to a very weak point in my life and all I can do is throw myself into His arms and ask for His strength. When I do that...I'm stronger than I could ever be on my own. Living in His strength allows for living under His grace. It's amazing to me how a word that is so powerful like strength can be so connected to a word that strikes such gentleness, grace. 2 Corinthians 12:9 "My grace is sufficient for you, for power is made perfect in weakness."
I don't have it all figured out yet, probably never will. It's still all just circling around in my brain as I try and grasp this concept. All I know is that I am weak, but somehow, each day, when I declare my weakness to the Lord, He returns it with strength and grace. I desire to offer up my ounce of grace each day and allow Him to fill my cup to overflowing with His all-sufficient grace and for His strength to be made known in my weakness.
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